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As with a low sucking sound it slowly disappeared again, Starbuck still gazing at the agitated waters where it had sunk, with a wild voice exclaimed—“Almost rather I had seen Moby Dick and fought him, than to have seen thee, thou white ghost!”
      “What was it, Sir?” said Flask.
      “The great live squid, which, they say, few whale-ships ever beheld and returned to their ports to tell of it.”

Moby-Dick, 1851


3-17-09  No one reads this column
Guys, FURL sucks. It has sucked for years, and I'm sorry I've been using it. I have switched over to delicious; I would have done this much sooner, but they made it really difficult the last time I tried.

4-21-08  Archives
Uhmm, apparently archives haven't really been working since late 2006. THANX for the heads up guys! They are temporarily fixed, and will stay temporarily fixed until I migrate to new software/layout. I have said some hilarious things in the last 7 years, that future generations will feel lucky I preserved. Go check them out.

1-18-08  new iPhone icon
Woah, it's been 3 years since the last news update! Fuzzysquid now has a webclips icon for your iPhone! It'll automagically show up when you add FS to your home screen. Atom and RSS feeds have been available for a few years now, but I never made special mention of it.

1-14-05  LJ images
Since it seems to be popular, and it's been linked in a lot of different places besides here, I've decided to post the LJ Images page. At least in the news, at least for now. It's also getting some Google ads because you LiveJournal people are sucking up all my bandwidth (35% for that one page!)

4-02-04  FURL
Check out what I've been browsing: FURL.net bookmark archive. Not much commentary, relevance, or sequitur—but it's what's keeping this blog from turning into a meme dumpster.



  1. TONMO - The Octopus News Magazine Online. Invaluable.
  2. Angrywhale - Meet Leonard. He's an angry sort of whale.
  3. The Squid Blog - From the Laughing Squid people.


  4. Moxyberry - Where the cousin is at. Her bookmarks here.
  5. Cranky User - Brian's bookmarks. Updated, unlike his site.
  6. Rosenstock - Her other ride is your mom.
  7. Lauren - Wet Hot Singaporean Blogging.
  8. Universal Donor - Like the prime number shitting bear, but with terrible back pain.
  9. Olivia - Who receives special dispensation from our usual policies.
BLAG  read the archive

Wednesday, August 29, 2001
dannyboy 8:36 PM (0)



whatever dude. you know that as soon as you guys get what you want, i'm raising prices so i make a profit. ingrates. "someone with a job that pays good money"?? pfft. who do we know that can qualify for that statement? and about this whole ship in bulk thing... i'd prefer if someone else deal with it. cus i know i'm going to front the money and order all sorts of stuff for you guys, and then all of a sudden can't reach you for a year. no thanks.

ticklemyfuzzysquid 6:04 AM (0)


so are we getting the shirts in bulk so that i dont have to spend extra for it. can someone with a job that pays good money buy it for me? i cant afford dans outrageous prices. who do you think we are????? 13 dollars for boxers??? nothing that expensive has ever been blessed to be so close to me butt. well work is boring i just worked a 12 hr day. i feel like a little native boy from SriLanka making kathy lee giford brand clothing, 12 hr day = $.50 paycheck. i need to join a union.

Tuesday, August 28, 2001
dannyboy 7:52 PM (0)



courtesy of blogdex, the most ridiculous site EVER. and possibly the most esoteric... don't bother if you don't know who wil wheaton is. ITS SO DAMN WEIRD. like how much he uses the word "hella." not since asia carrera.com have i been so utterly flabbergasted at someone's personal website...

dannyboy 7:17 PM (0)


see what everyone else is blogging about. blogdex

Malb 6:45 AM (0)


word of the week:snoogins!!!

Monday, August 27, 2001
dannyboy 5:03 PM (0)



kutsiekuddly: I haven't had my first full day until wednesday kutsiekuddly: I meet with a few classes tomorrow (middle school) dkuo: middle school... thats like... 5th grade? kutsiekuddly: 6-8th dkuo: oh dkuo: are they like, inner city kids? kutsiekuddly: no...private school kutsiekuddly: some really rich kids dkuo: oh. pfft kutsiekuddly: some not so rich dkuo: that's easy then dkuo: just tell them to surf for porn dkuo: done dkuo: class dismissed kutsiekuddly: haha kutsiekuddly: I don't think the faculty would look highly upon that dkuo: lock the doors kutsiekuddly: boob.com dkuo: and tell them if they squeal you'll touch them in their private parts kutsiekuddly: hahaha kutsiekuddly: wait... kutsiekuddly: it's an all boys school kutsiekuddly: I don't know about that dkuo: yes...? dkuo: whats the problem dkuo: you like little boys kutsiekuddly: maybe if they squeal I'll kick them in their private parts dkuo: man, all boys schools mess you up kutsiekuddly: hey, I went to a public school dkuo: yeah... well. even in co-ed school some kids fall through the cracks... dkuo: hey, fuzzysquid has new stuff dkuo: go buy it kutsiekuddly: I'll show the kids fuzzysquid.com dkuo: uh. kutsiekuddly: I'll make it an assignment to buy stuff dkuo: i'd better raise the prices then kutsiekuddly: if you don't come to class on monday with at least one article of fuzzysquid clothing you fail...and get kicked in the nuts dkuo: finally, a business model that makes sense

dannyboy 4:21 PM (0)


tons of new stuff went live this past weekend, including several new items in the squid store as well as a new front page. i've had a lot of pictures i've been wanting to put up on the site (graduation, wedding, a certain someone's car accident...) and i've been waiting for my new modem to get here before i went ahead and did that. but my modem's been backordered for a month now... anyway. i shouldn't be buying any more stuff for a long time... i got a statement for my discover card the other day and i almost fainted. apparently, i had suddenly become a moron and completely IGNORED MY LAST BILL (again!). for the second month in a row i had to call them up and pay my balance over the phone. the first time it was because they never delivered my statement, which i excused because i had moved and i assume it just missed me. but this second time, i did get a statment, which i paid online in full, and then i was penalized for not paying something that was never included on that bill! needless to say i settled that quickly and cancelled the card. discover can go soak themselves. (cashback is a big crock anyway. do you have any idea how insignificant 1% is?? DAMN U MICHAEL CHANG! DAMN U TO HELL)

Sunday, August 26, 2001
dannyboy 11:13 AM (0)



damnit! i just realized that my palm pilot has NOT been synching up with my computer... i had to get some new hardware just to hook it back up with the mac since the lightning strike fried some stuff. i can't even begin to figure out whats wrong with it. pain end, when?

Thursday, August 23, 2001
dannyboy 10:55 PM (0)



new (limited edition) item coming to the store soon! plus redesigned t-shirts! really! i promise. soon.

Wednesday, August 22, 2001
Malb 8:09 AM (0)



Finally, The Tick has come back to Fox in the form of Patrick Warburton aka "Puddy." On thursdays this fall @ 8:30. "Here ya go, weary traveler. One steaming hot cup of justice.?

Monday, August 20, 2001
dannyboy 11:24 PM (0)



awesome! i'm posting this with my phone! finally a good use for WAP

dannyboy 10:43 PM (0)


Dear Victor: I'm reminded of a conversation I overheard in the locker room in high school, which I think is apropos to this situation. "Dude, if you want to date a 14 year old girl that's your business; don't ask me to give you props for it."

dannyboy 11:08 AM (0)


i'm writing this from a "free" internet station inside dever international airport. all you need is an e-mail address that you're willing to have spam sent to. (weren't you getting tired of alex@fuzzysquid.com anyway?) so on the way here i had this cab driver who gave me the history on all the graft that's been associated with the airport. typical stuff, billions of dollars missing, etc., but the best of it was this fare he had one night driving a flight crew back downtown from the airport. he said that the captain was sitting up front with him and was really unsettled. the driver asked him what was wrong and the captain explained how he had to abort a take-off that night, right at the end of the runway because both of his engines had failed. when they got out they saw that giant chunks of concrete had broken off the ground and got sucked through the engines. he said he had never seen that happen before, and they determined later that it was because of low-quality concrete. then my driver assured me that this was years ago, and they had surely fixed the problem by now. denver is a pretty nice city... for me to POOP ON!!

Sunday, August 19, 2001
VML 9:31 PM (0)



What fun would a legal girlfriend be? All they want you to do is to pay attention to them and buy them things so that they can feel "secure".... Much more fun if they aren't legal yet. They just want to have fun......

Saturday, August 18, 2001
Malb 9:26 AM (0)



dude sam you [offensive word deleted--benny, you embarass yourself more than us. but not by much] !!!! i always knew you wanted to be a woman...growing out your hair and all...hahahaha

Inky The Squid 12:38 AM (0)


FLOOPSSH! zzAIE2brrt. happy birthday victor! GGKpff# cheers on being 32! girlfriend legal yet? pachoooSF..@$

Wednesday, August 15, 2001
dannyboy 12:23 AM (0)



damnit i miss cmu. best robot dog soccer team EVER.

Tuesday, August 14, 2001
dannyboy 8:02 PM (0)



Dear Virgin: OK, if you're 27 and still a virgin, I can only assume that you're: 1. Ugly as sin, 2. socially inept or 3. all of the above. Whichever it is, the answer is still the same: NO!

skeebo 8:00 PM (0)


Dear dannyboy: At 27 years olds, I may be a late bloomer, but I fianlly feel that I am ready for my first sexual experience. I've always imagined that the first time would be with an older woman, someone with maturity and patience. I read your column every week and have always thought you were very attractive, intelligent and interesting. I honestly think you would make a wonderful teacher in the bedroom. Would you be willing to introduce me to the joys of lovemaking? - Virgin in Massachusetts

Monday, August 13, 2001
dannyboy 10:53 AM (0)



lyrics of fury

Wednesday, August 08, 2001
dannyboy 8:45 PM (0)



good grief. its official. the title for the next star wars movie is: Star Wars: Episode II Attack of the Clones. this just goes to prove my theory: george lucas is a moron.

Tuesday, August 07, 2001
dannyboy 6:37 PM (0)



oh, and i finally got WAP working on my phone (after a call to the tech support people). its kind of... sad actually. now i stay up at night in bed (thanks to the OLED) playing gladiator on my three-line microbrowser... and chatting on IM at 3 words per minute. feh.

dannyboy 6:34 PM (0)


are we having another bbq this weekend? if so tell me soon. i'll have to do laundry

Wednesday, August 01, 2001
eito 8:37 AM (0)



free admission for those who wear the fuzzysquid shirt???

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