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As with a low sucking sound it slowly disappeared again, Starbuck still gazing at the agitated waters where it had sunk, with a wild voice exclaimed—“Almost rather I had seen Moby Dick and fought him, than to have seen thee, thou white ghost!”
      “What was it, Sir?” said Flask.
      “The great live squid, which, they say, few whale-ships ever beheld and returned to their ports to tell of it.”

Moby-Dick, 1851


3-17-09  No one reads this column
Guys, FURL sucks. It has sucked for years, and I'm sorry I've been using it. I have switched over to delicious; I would have done this much sooner, but they made it really difficult the last time I tried.

4-21-08  Archives
Uhmm, apparently archives haven't really been working since late 2006. THANX for the heads up guys! They are temporarily fixed, and will stay temporarily fixed until I migrate to new software/layout. I have said some hilarious things in the last 7 years, that future generations will feel lucky I preserved. Go check them out.

1-18-08  new iPhone icon
Woah, it's been 3 years since the last news update! Fuzzysquid now has a webclips icon for your iPhone! It'll automagically show up when you add FS to your home screen. Atom and RSS feeds have been available for a few years now, but I never made special mention of it.

1-14-05  LJ images
Since it seems to be popular, and it's been linked in a lot of different places besides here, I've decided to post the LJ Images page. At least in the news, at least for now. It's also getting some Google ads because you LiveJournal people are sucking up all my bandwidth (35% for that one page!)

4-02-04  FURL
Check out what I've been browsing: FURL.net bookmark archive. Not much commentary, relevance, or sequitur—but it's what's keeping this blog from turning into a meme dumpster.



  1. TONMO - The Octopus News Magazine Online. Invaluable.
  2. Angrywhale - Meet Leonard. He's an angry sort of whale.
  3. The Squid Blog - From the Laughing Squid people.


  4. Moxyberry - Where the cousin is at. Her bookmarks here.
  5. Cranky User - Brian's bookmarks. Updated, unlike his site.
  6. Rosenstock - Her other ride is your mom.
  7. Lauren - Wet Hot Singaporean Blogging.
  8. Universal Donor - Like the prime number shitting bear, but with terrible back pain.
  9. Olivia - Who receives special dispensation from our usual policies.
BLAG  read the archive

Monday, April 05, 2004
dannyboy 1:01 PM (0)



I overheard a conversation at a party this weekend, and two very white very middle class guys were talking about the man who was threatening to jump off the Bay Bridge on Friday. They both were complaining about the traffic it caused and said that the guy should have just jumped. One of them even calculated how many people were delayed and for how long, and his argument was that the total amount of time lost for every person added up to a lifetime, so whether or not the guy jumped he had already cost the commuter-body the equivalent of one life.

Now, this is a disgusting thing to say, and if we weren't in someone's home I would've told him what a retarded dick he was, and kidney punches would have definitely been in order. But more offensive than the apparent "I'd rather someone die than be inconvenienced" attitude that is en vogue with all the hip middle class white boys, is the fact that he was clearly self-conscious of this image he was projecting, and did not say so because he actually felt that way, but because he wanted all eyes on him. He had the look of someone waiting expectantly after telling a "witty" joke. And on top of that call of bullshit, is an extra heaping of vomitudinous bile, for that thought isn't even his own. No, toilet-licker, you didn't work the numbers in your car while you were delayed, and they weren't "rounded figures, but accurate nonetheless." It's the same hackneyed shock argument that gets trotted out by all the wannabe pundit-contrarians every time there's a jumper.

Want to know the real cause of traffic? Fucktards like you who insist on coming from and going to the East Bay. Dickhole.

Epilogue: The jumper didn't jump, he was "tactically removed," I drank 4 more beers after that encounter, and "vomitudinous" isn't a word.

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