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As with a low sucking sound it slowly disappeared again, Starbuck still gazing at the agitated waters where it had sunk, with a wild voice exclaimed—“Almost rather I had seen Moby Dick and fought him, than to have seen thee, thou white ghost!”
      “What was it, Sir?” said Flask.
      “The great live squid, which, they say, few whale-ships ever beheld and returned to their ports to tell of it.”

Moby-Dick, 1851


3-17-09  No one reads this column
Guys, FURL sucks. It has sucked for years, and I'm sorry I've been using it. I have switched over to delicious; I would have done this much sooner, but they made it really difficult the last time I tried.

4-21-08  Archives
Uhmm, apparently archives haven't really been working since late 2006. THANX for the heads up guys! They are temporarily fixed, and will stay temporarily fixed until I migrate to new software/layout. I have said some hilarious things in the last 7 years, that future generations will feel lucky I preserved. Go check them out.

1-18-08  new iPhone icon
Woah, it's been 3 years since the last news update! Fuzzysquid now has a webclips icon for your iPhone! It'll automagically show up when you add FS to your home screen. Atom and RSS feeds have been available for a few years now, but I never made special mention of it.

1-14-05  LJ images
Since it seems to be popular, and it's been linked in a lot of different places besides here, I've decided to post the LJ Images page. At least in the news, at least for now. It's also getting some Google ads because you LiveJournal people are sucking up all my bandwidth (35% for that one page!)

4-02-04  FURL
Check out what I've been browsing: FURL.net bookmark archive. Not much commentary, relevance, or sequitur—but it's what's keeping this blog from turning into a meme dumpster.



  1. TONMO - The Octopus News Magazine Online. Invaluable.
  2. Angrywhale - Meet Leonard. He's an angry sort of whale.
  3. The Squid Blog - From the Laughing Squid people.


  4. Moxyberry - Where the cousin is at. Her bookmarks here.
  5. Cranky User - Brian's bookmarks. Updated, unlike his site.
  6. Rosenstock - Her other ride is your mom.
  7. Lauren - Wet Hot Singaporean Blogging.
  8. Universal Donor - Like the prime number shitting bear, but with terrible back pain.
  9. Olivia - Who receives special dispensation from our usual policies.
BLAG  read the archive

Friday, June 30, 2006
dannyboy 5:26 PM (0)



tencorsocomo: drink more cough syrup
tencorsocomo: like hell of it
dkuo: "like hell of it"
dkuo: I don't understand what you're saying to me
tencorsocomo: that means "a lot of it"
dkuo: that's silly
tencorsocomo: welcome to nor cal
dkuo: I've lived here for almost 4 years
dkuo: you're the only one who says that
dkuo: seriously.
tencorsocomo: well maybe you don't know enough 12 year olds
tencorsocomo: my mom stole my potatoes

Tuesday, June 27, 2006
dannyboy 12:00 AM (0)



One of my neighbors is learning to play the ukulele. He's just starting. Did I mention he's trying to sing at the same time? And that my bedroom shares a wall with his? Sigh.

Monday, June 19, 2006
dannyboy 11:24 PM (3)



I dig the one with the bike tube valve where he's got a bloody hand in the final picture. But practically speaking I'm going to have to try more of these, like the one in the video with a sheet a paper.


Yeah, it all started with this video, by a Dane, which I immediately tried with surprising success.

And then I found the German version.

I think while the Germans are obsessed with cataloging every possible permutation of what are essentially two methods (the push & the lever pry), and necessarily include some very inefficient and flawed examples (e.g., the duct tape roll in the video where he spills on himself), the Scandinavian ethos seems to prefer elegance and pragmatism, AND provides good reason to always have another beer handy.

Also, I have no idea what I?m talking about.


Also, "Anybody But Brazil". K THX BYE


Thanks to a bewildering German instructional video, I now know how to open a beer bottle with nothing but sheer force of will. I am now a man.

moxy 9:33 PM (2)


We never should have landed a man on the moon. It's a mistake. Now everything is compared to that one accomplishment. I can't believe they could land a man on the moon . . . and taste my coffee! I think we all would have been a lot happier if they hadn't landed a man on the moon. Then we'd go, They can't make a prescription bottle top that's easy to open? I'm not surprised they couldn't land a man on the moon. Things make perfect sense to me now. Neil Armstrong should have said, "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for every, complaining, sob on the face of the earth."


Do you have a machine in your apartment, or is it shared with the rest of the building? Maybe someone had a few drinks at the Dove and took a business card that was printed on red stock and left it in a brand new shirt they've only worn onceblaarrrghH!

Honestly, if this could happen to you, you know, a woman, what hope could I, a sad bachelor, possibly have?


I refuse to believe that we can send a man to the moon but cannot keep clothes from bleeding in the wash.

I'm not sure how this happened but a beige pillowcase and three white cotton tees came out of the dryer a definite shade pinker (ugly pink, at that.) Nothing in the load; the closest thing was a light pink pair of underwear that's been washed many times before without incident. What the heck? Argh!

Thursday, June 15, 2006
dannyboy 10:05 AM (2)



I actually enjoy the current. I like the first 2 pics...nice homage to me :) I can't believe I had this full beard thing going on.


i like the 1st. :P



Medium-short - College, 1999.
Short - Post-College, 2001.
Still short - Early SF, 2003.
Getting shaggy - Mid-SF, 2004.
Long - Last year, 2005.
Long-ish - Current, 2006.

Monday, June 12, 2006
dannyboy 8:39 AM (6)



I think you should try something new. You've had a similar haircut for like ...as long as I've known you... sometimes it's longer or shorter. Go for short and spiky...or mohawk... go crazy!! CRAZY!!!


WTF. Shouldn't you be on your honeymoon in Greece of wherevs. Why are you reading my website! Go tell your wife you love her!!

Also, that's not true. In college I had really short hair. For a few years after that it was shortish hair. And then about a year and a half ago I started growing my hair longer. It got really long 6 months ago and now it's back to being medium.

I wanted a mohawk, and not one of those pussy fauxhawks everyone's got. I need a year off on an island to experiment with growing my various hairs.


OMG! Back when we worked together I remember you totally obsessing over your hair in the mirror.


What was the context of that? I vaguely remember something like that...


I can't remember back that far! I need pictures of Dan over the years. Put together a timeline.


Another hair picture timeline? I had that on the 'about' page a while ago.


I dreamed last night that I had a really bad haircut. It was awful!

Monday, June 05, 2006
dannyboy 10:28 AM (4)



More like sausagefest. Surely you didn't pose in the picture?


We can't all sit around the company feedbag with Kiki Wolfkill. And when I say 'sit around' I mean 'she's fat'.


one day she'll google herself and end up on this page.


And one day she will reduce all that sprung weight, shave seconds off her lap, and we will make hot monkey love together and have fat little babies who we'll give the surname Kuo-Wolfkill.

Until then, no deal, fattie.


More photos from yesterday, all by BDOUGR. Click for bigger.

Sunday, June 04, 2006
dannyboy 11:48 PM (0)




Dorkfest was fun, if a bit, uh, dorky. It's a strange and fun feeling driving up the coast and into town in 40 identical cars.

A little surprise was the MZ4 that the Roundel people brought with them for the photoshoot. Ever since the X-Coupé concept was unveiled, I've thrown up in my mouth a little each time I've seen photos of it. But now... well, it's certainly much less ugly in person. I got to sit in it for a bit and there are still lots of head-smack inducing details: the giant squishy steering wheel that makes me feel like I'm holding onto overstuffed sausages; the 3 inches of rear visibility; a rear-end that looks like it belongs on an Eagle Talon; and the truly nauseating polka-dot bumper reflectors. But... there's something oddly compelling about it. If only I had $60k... I'd have trouble picking between it and the Porsche.

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