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As with a low sucking sound it slowly disappeared again, Starbuck still gazing at the agitated waters where it had sunk, with a wild voice exclaimed—“Almost rather I had seen Moby Dick and fought him, than to have seen thee, thou white ghost!”
      “What was it, Sir?” said Flask.
      “The great live squid, which, they say, few whale-ships ever beheld and returned to their ports to tell of it.”

Moby-Dick, 1851


3-17-09  No one reads this column
Guys, FURL sucks. It has sucked for years, and I'm sorry I've been using it. I have switched over to delicious; I would have done this much sooner, but they made it really difficult the last time I tried.

4-21-08  Archives
Uhmm, apparently archives haven't really been working since late 2006. THANX for the heads up guys! They are temporarily fixed, and will stay temporarily fixed until I migrate to new software/layout. I have said some hilarious things in the last 7 years, that future generations will feel lucky I preserved. Go check them out.

1-18-08  new iPhone icon
Woah, it's been 3 years since the last news update! Fuzzysquid now has a webclips icon for your iPhone! It'll automagically show up when you add FS to your home screen. Atom and RSS feeds have been available for a few years now, but I never made special mention of it.

1-14-05  LJ images
Since it seems to be popular, and it's been linked in a lot of different places besides here, I've decided to post the LJ Images page. At least in the news, at least for now. It's also getting some Google ads because you LiveJournal people are sucking up all my bandwidth (35% for that one page!)

4-02-04  FURL
Check out what I've been browsing: FURL.net bookmark archive. Not much commentary, relevance, or sequitur—but it's what's keeping this blog from turning into a meme dumpster.



  1. TONMO - The Octopus News Magazine Online. Invaluable.
  2. Angrywhale - Meet Leonard. He's an angry sort of whale.
  3. The Squid Blog - From the Laughing Squid people.


  4. Moxyberry - Where the cousin is at. Her bookmarks here.
  5. Cranky User - Brian's bookmarks. Updated, unlike his site.
  6. Rosenstock - Her other ride is your mom.
  7. Lauren - Wet Hot Singaporean Blogging.
  8. Universal Donor - Like the prime number shitting bear, but with terrible back pain.
  9. Olivia - Who receives special dispensation from our usual policies.
BLAG  read the archive

Monday, May 29, 2006
dannyboy 12:14 PM (0)




Tuesday, May 23, 2006
dannyboy 11:11 PM (0)



The day after my dinner, I found myself standing in front of the fridge, angry at a salami for not tasting better. I'm sorry, salami, it's not your fault. You are as the factory made you.

Friday, May 19, 2006
dannyboy 2:01 PM (3)



I was in Montreal last week, so like Dan, I had some French food. Also I had a chance for fois gras, and skipped it. I don't miss it.. I had Wild Boar instead. But next time I'll be hitting up the fois gras.

Now I want to try this French Laundry place. Sounds like the Herb Farm in Seattle.
Which is supposed to be the top place to eat, and does the 8 course thing as well. Maybe some days I'll try it. I still prefer the steak from El Goucho, which I'll make Dan try if he could ever visit again!


The French Laundry is the world's best restaurant. Well, it was, the last few years. There's now a restaurant in England and restaurant in Spain that took 1st and 2nd place this year, but it's still the best restaurant in America. It's basically impossible to get reservations, or else I'd be back next month. Well, maybe in two months. Gotta save up some more money...


Oh, and regarding Montreal:

a) You didn't go to that fois gras restaurant?
b) Surely you had some poutine?


I mean, not to belabor this, and I wouldn't call it life-changing as some of my friends have, but my god. I spent a lot of money last night and I don't feel bad about it at all. Everyone's been asking, so I'll just consolidate some of the conversations I've had about this so far. They couldn't seat us at our reservation time of 9:15, and they apologized by way of champagne, several small bites and another round of wine, all before we got to our table. I guess that's why it's the best restaurant in the world.

They were also super accommodating. One of the little courses they brought out while we were waiting was this little ice cream cone type thing (my beautiful description betraying my middle-class upbringing), filled with creme fraiche and topped with salmon puree. Someone in our party was a vegetarian, and couldn't eat it; they apologized for not asking first and sent out a veggie-friendly cone within a few minutes, which of course was just as amazing. In fact the one substitution for our vegetarian friend (they have a vegetable tasting menu, but he doesn't eat mushrooms) was an envy-inducing risotto topped generously with black truffle, grated at the table.

The couple in our party had doubts. Before we sat down they were wondering if a lot of eating at French Laundry is about bragging rights; being able to say that you've spent so much money on one meal. But after 9 courses, every one of us saying "my god this is amazing" with each first bite--well, actually it was more like 14 courses--well, no, actually, after the very first course they were already won over.

I grieve for that fois gras.

It was a 3.5 hour experience that was sublime and challenging. An endurance test that was it's own prize. What a pretentious thing to say, but absolutely true nonetheless.

dannyboy 1:21 PM (0)


The biggest mistake in my life is now this: not opting for the fois gras course last night. :( :( :( I will be lamenting this for years. Or at least until I go back...

dannyboy 2:35 AM (0)


Just got home from French Laundry. Excellent food. Terrifyingly good service. I'm exhausted.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006
dannyboy 8:30 AM (1)



"it looks like someone sat on the broccoli"-you



“I will make vinaigrette out of that shit” -M., referring to my glass of Samuel Adams Triple Bock, which despite the lager-style name is actually an ale. Well, actually, it's not so much an ale as it is a pungent syrup of doom. Entirely uncarbonated and without so much as a spittle-on-the-corner-of-your-mouth's worth of head, the bottle draws comparison to a vintage port or sherry (though it's most closely related to a barley wine, the inclusion of maple syrup as an ingredient changes things a bit), and The Samuel Adams people advise you to drink it as such—room temperature in a snifter, just a few ounces at a time. Heed their advice, as this "beer" weighs in at a heroic 17.5% alcohol by vol. So, what did I think? Well, I wouldn't call it undrinkable, as many others have. And I think characterizing it as having a 'soy sauce bouquet' is unfair. I do think M. is right; it's more acerbic than it is sweet, and it's more stong than it is anything else. I'd much rather drizzle it on a plate with olive oil and dip bread into it, than drink it. Because I can buy a nice bottle of port or sherry, and I'd much rather drink a bottle of Chocolate Bock if I wanted a beer at the extremes. (But on the other hand, this review makes me want to buy another bottle of the '97 and let it age some more.)

Wednesday, May 10, 2006
dannyboy 10:20 AM (0)



UPDATE to my rant from a few days ago. Well, apparently, the way to get some attention from a certain cell phone company (starts with C and rhymes with fingerhair) is to write an angry 2 page letter detailing their trangressions and threatening to slander them with all my clients, and email that to all the c-level executives.

An hour later someone from the Office of the President called me and promised to fix it. She said it would take up to 5 days to get a definitive response from the tech people. And I agreed! WTF! It's like an abusive relationship!

telco: "we can change!"
me: "yeah fucking right, I've heard THAT before"
telco: "come on baby, don't be like that! It'll be different this time"
me: "oh... alright, but you have to do anal take off some charges"

And! And! then the weasels I named in my letter (I named names) called me up and were all "erm... yeah, remember how we said before that there's no way in hell you're getting out of your contract without paying the early termination fee? Uh, we can let you out of your contract without paying the fee now, so uhm, I've gone ahead and marked your account for termination tomorrow! Let's forget all this ever happened!"

Oh ho, no you don't! Not until I get someone's head on a platter. THE DAY IS MINE!

Saturday, May 06, 2006
dannyboy 1:13 PM (0)




Immigration rally, Downtown San Francisco


It's totally not too cold for a frozen margarita

Friday, May 05, 2006
dannyboy 3:00 PM (0)



Well, I've been on the phone with my cell phone company for the last two weeks, and apparently it's my fault that after a year of problem free use, I suddenly cannot text message with anyone outside their network. Hey, their technicians looked into it and said there's nothing wrong. MUST be me.

Why doesn't someone grab a few hundred million of the VC that's flying around right now and start a phone company that treats you like... a human being? Stop hiring from the dregs of society for your support positions, get rid of contracts altogether, and stop crippling my phone, and you will eat everyone's lunch. You could charge me twice as much as you do now, take away the Free Minutes To People With The Same Last Name As You or whatever nonsense carrot they're using these days, and I would still wait in line like a starving Bolshevik to give you my money.

Oh god and the cherry on top of my consumerist wet dream would be for someone competent (like Apple) to design a phone that didn't make me want to screech at the top of my lungs and smash it into the ground like the monkeys from 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006
dannyboy 9:30 PM (1)



You could just put on your ipod...watch some video. In that case you have switched the channel. From real life to TV. I wonder when I'll be able to do that in meetings.

I'm so tired today.


I HAVE A THEORY about why the use of cell phones in public places bothers people so much (myself included). An older woman on the bus this morning snapped at a twenty-something girl and said "thanks for forcing me to listen to all your personal details for the past half hour." Mild, middleclass, verbal one-upmanship ensued (as opposed to, say, this). Which brings me to my point. People get annoyed when you talk on the phone not because you're breaking the social contract for polite behavior in a public space, but because you're fucking boring. The format of your performance, the monologue which forces everyone else into the role of the voyeur, is entirely familiar; we're used to it because we see it every time we watch television or go to a movie. Except there, we have the promise of entertainment; when that promise is broken, we change the channel or leave the theatre. Here, you've taken the spotlight to tell us about the insufferably mundane minutiae of your life, but I can't turn you off without getting off the bus. That's why I fantasize about stuffing your phone inside your mouth like a ball gag—because I don't care what gift you're getting your best friend, or that you don't like whitefish, or that your buddy should really come out to Tahoe this weekend because blah blah blah BLAH BLAH FUCKITY BLAH! Ugh. If you can't threaten to kill your baby's momma because she's been with another man, or at least explain what the blonde was doing in the bar with a poodle under one arm and a salami under the other, then stop using the goddamned phone. Get some writers for chrissake.

Monday, May 01, 2006
dannyboy 1:44 PM (2)



I had an opportunity to see them tonight but wasn't in the mood to sit through them for 2 hours and not get up and do anything else.


You mean looking at your shoes and swaying softly for 2 hours isn't enough activity for you?

Wait... you get to sit?


I really like Sigur Ros now, where previously I mostly just enjoyed mocking their made-up moon language.

J. wrote a check to me and in the memo field she wrote "crack rock." That made me laugh out loud and then I felt a little embarrassed about laughing. I think the enjoyment/guilt is because I tend to leave little jokes like that for people, which I imagine mostly go unnoticed.

Why is your resume more than one page long? Honestly? Who do you think you are? And if you're applying for a design position, your resume should look like it was… designed? ARHGH.

dannyboy 12:43 PM (2)


And people should really "donate" to the cause, really. Stamps do cost money.


What kind of donation? A sexy donation?


On Easter sunday Jessie sent out 100 handmade Valentines. Here's a sneak peek at the one I got.

dannyboy 10:46 AM (2)


tanning bed?


No, beach. I live in California, remember?


I'm tanned. :3

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