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As with a low sucking sound it slowly disappeared again, Starbuck still gazing at the agitated waters where it had sunk, with a wild voice exclaimed—“Almost rather I had seen Moby Dick and fought him, than to have seen thee, thou white ghost!”
      “What was it, Sir?” said Flask.
      “The great live squid, which, they say, few whale-ships ever beheld and returned to their ports to tell of it.”

Moby-Dick, 1851


3-17-09  No one reads this column
Guys, FURL sucks. It has sucked for years, and I'm sorry I've been using it. I have switched over to delicious; I would have done this much sooner, but they made it really difficult the last time I tried.

4-21-08  Archives
Uhmm, apparently archives haven't really been working since late 2006. THANX for the heads up guys! They are temporarily fixed, and will stay temporarily fixed until I migrate to new software/layout. I have said some hilarious things in the last 7 years, that future generations will feel lucky I preserved. Go check them out.

1-18-08  new iPhone icon
Woah, it's been 3 years since the last news update! Fuzzysquid now has a webclips icon for your iPhone! It'll automagically show up when you add FS to your home screen. Atom and RSS feeds have been available for a few years now, but I never made special mention of it.

1-14-05  LJ images
Since it seems to be popular, and it's been linked in a lot of different places besides here, I've decided to post the LJ Images page. At least in the news, at least for now. It's also getting some Google ads because you LiveJournal people are sucking up all my bandwidth (35% for that one page!)

4-02-04  FURL
Check out what I've been browsing: FURL.net bookmark archive. Not much commentary, relevance, or sequitur—but it's what's keeping this blog from turning into a meme dumpster.



  1. TONMO - The Octopus News Magazine Online. Invaluable.
  2. Angrywhale - Meet Leonard. He's an angry sort of whale.
  3. The Squid Blog - From the Laughing Squid people.


  4. Moxyberry - Where the cousin is at. Her bookmarks here.
  5. Cranky User - Brian's bookmarks. Updated, unlike his site.
  6. Rosenstock - Her other ride is your mom.
  7. Lauren - Wet Hot Singaporean Blogging.
  8. Universal Donor - Like the prime number shitting bear, but with terrible back pain.
  9. Olivia - Who receives special dispensation from our usual policies.
BLAG  read the archive

Saturday, July 31, 2004
dannyboy 12:47 PM (0)



There is a blue moon tonight. Which means, if I don't have sex, the terrorists will have already won.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004
dannyboy 4:23 PM (0)



So a big part of why I write this blog is so I have a record of my life to go back to. I don't keep scrapbooks or shoeboxes full of pictures. This is more or less it. So I'm writing memories down before I forget for good. Looking at posts from just a year ago are very revealing, in a masturbatory kind of way. This does NOT give you fuckers free license to deconstruct my shit though, so I don't want any e-mail from people "who can save me." Unless you're hot.

Anyhow, Marie sent over some wedding photos today. No, she's not married yet (it's not even her real dress!), but they had some portraits done, as Chinese people will do. At the reception we will all be dancing under a huge, looming, Mao-like photo of the happy couple.

In addition to her "wedding" photos, she also mentioned that her mom, out of nowhere, pulled out a photo of us at the prom. Marie's not the first of my friends to get married. But. As happy as I am for them, it is disconcerting. I always assumed I would have years of hitting the bars with her as my walking evidence*, but not so. I am getting old.

But on the brighter side, they sure made her boobs look great.

*What is the term for this? You know, chick friends that you go out with in order to attract other girls. Like wearing a fake wedding ring, and/or a sign that says "I LOVE COMMITMENT & CHANGING MYSELF"

dannyboy 12:22 PM (0)


I'm currently withdrawing from anything that requires extended emotional commitment. For example, I don't have the patience, attention span, whatever, for reading new blogs anymore. And there are plenty out there that I know I would enjoy. I just can't be bothered to get involved. Just like I've been incapable of reading fiction, especially known good books, for the last few years. I just don't want to get involved. WTF? I don't want the journey, I just want the executive summary. It's like my emotional facilities are on vacation and they don't want to deal with any of that shit until they get home.

And now that I've written all that, I realize it isn't true at all. I seek involvement just like I always have, but I'm definitely avoiding something. Maybe I'm just fucking lazy, where exercising my sensitivity is the effort. I don't want to read good books because I will miss them when they are done. (Can you believe that?) My escape velocity for caring is too high.

Which reminds me of this ridiculous quote, which may not be relevant at all:

Catwoman star Sharon Stone told Rolling Stone magazine that the brain aneurysm that nearly killed her was actually a blessing in disguise because it significantly lowered her tolerance for bullshit.

"I'm at the point in my life where if you don't want my peaches, don't shake my tree," she said. "I'm into Happy Town, and if you don't want to live in Happy Town, move, hit the friggin' bricks, baby."
(emphasis mine)

Monday, July 26, 2004
dannyboy 1:46 PM (0)



Three (3) people announced they were leaving the company this morning. Which led to the inevitable NOTHING IS WRONG WITH THE COMPANY!! speech, which I pretty much have memorized by now. Jesus pummel horse crotch-landing christ.

Saturday, July 24, 2004
Malb 9:09 PM (0)



Big stupid Jedi jerks. How dumb can George Lucas get?

Thursday, July 22, 2004
dannyboy 1:55 PM (0)



Lord, I've never really asked you for much*, but you see, there's this thing I really want...

*just the usual fame, wealth, and that thou wouldst rain down thy fiery vengeance against mine enemies, in thy mercy.

Monday, July 19, 2004
dannyboy 9:56 AM (0)




(look carefully)

Saturday, July 17, 2004
dannyboy 1:48 AM (0)



Blimey. Thank you for the postcard, whoever you are. It is really something. I will be in New York Aug. 6th-9th, perhaps we should get a drink. Or are we already? That invitation goes for the rest of my (identified) friends as well, I'd like to see as many of you as I can.

Thursday, July 15, 2004
dannyboy 10:56 PM (0)



ENDORSEMENT: So the thing about my politics, and many liberal Democrats get accused of this, is that I'm being "elitist." Do I think that the vast majority of Republican voters are completely retarded? Fuck yes. What else would you call someone who supports economic policy that by and large does not benefit them? I mean how dumb do you have to be that you can't even get self-serving right?

But the thing is, I think the majority of Democrats are completely retarded as well. Have you ever seen a war protest? The difference is, these morons happened to have picked the right side. Which isn't hard, I mean, when you've basically only got two choices.

So come November, just remember this:
People Are Fucktards: Vote Kerry/Edwards

dannyboy 3:44 PM (0)


All of you religious nuts (you know who you are) need to read this missive from Bill Moyers: "How do we nurture the healing side of religion over the killing side? How do we protect the soul of democracy against bad theology in service of an imperial state?" Democracy in the Balance, a.k.a, follow the money, stupid.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004
dannyboy 9:38 AM (0)



STUPID BRAIN: I woke up at 4:30 this morning for some reason, and then couldn't get back to sleep. I was tired, but I just laid there and kept thinking about random things; work, life, people I miss, the theme song to Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Uggrgh. There is nothing funny or clever about this post, as I am tired and hung over. And sore, because I fell down the stairs last night. In other news, I now live with a vegan. I will convert her soon. Number one in the hood, G.

Sunday, July 11, 2004
dannyboy 2:20 PM (0)



I think it would be fun to get drunk and send out all the e-mails in my drafts folder. Or disastrous. Am I the only one with a trail of psychosis perfectly described in a pile of unsent mail?

Saturday, July 10, 2004
J.Ro 1:36 PM (0)



The new self extinguishing cigarettes that are supposed to go out if they aren't smoked for a moment are a lie. They really just burn a whole lot faster, and they suck.

Friday, July 09, 2004
dannyboy 3:52 PM (0)



Well, another person just quit the company. And on a completely unrelated, and not at all allegorical tangent, one of the toilets here has been broken for the last few days. It runs constantly, and is unable to be flushed. No one bothered to call a plumber or take any action, so I went and fixed it myself. I'll look into sending them a bill.

dannyboy 9:33 AM (0)


“I am mortified to be told that, in the United States of America, the sale of a book can become a subject of inquiry, and of criminal inquiry too.”

-Thomas Jefferson

(Attempt to amend the PATRIOT act dies in the House)

Thursday, July 08, 2004
dannyboy 2:31 PM (0)



How Tintin is censored in Iran. And a followup. RRGH! Vandals! Body snatchers! Ostrogoths!

Sunday, July 04, 2004
dannyboy 1:12 AM (0)



I am very tempted to drink a 12 hour old milkshake right now.

Saturday, July 03, 2004
dannyboy 2:52 AM (0)



I had Kobe beef sashimi tonight for the first time and it tasted almost exactly like... thin slices of raw beef. Ahem. I couldn't help but think that it would be so much better if they just seared it a tiny tiny bit. I'll get the steak next time.

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